A Public Service Message

Don't have kids, and I'll tell you why.

A quick portion of my average day...

So, there I was. Drinking my drink and cruising around on the web doing my usual rounds and acting like the wholesome-Mr-Cleaver-type that I am. Then....the boys came home.
I have two sons that are 12 and 7 but act like they are women in their mid 70's. They have actually argued about the right order to put their shoes on. They drive me fucking insane!
Anyways, the eldest gets home first and does his homework quietly at the kitchen table while probably thinking up ways to torture his little brother when he gets home. I believe it took all of 3 minutes after my 7yr old got home before they were arguing. This time it was about what my 7yr old wanted to eat for a snack and then it went from there. It resulted in me forcing them to go out for at least an hour... and this is a mild day.
If there is any company that manufactures sperm stoppers like condoms/foam/birth control pills etc. and they would like a new campaign to boost their products 100,000%, just make a tape of me during my average day. Hell, I'll do it for free just to help out my fellow man. Shit, the booze companies could make a fortune off of me also. Then again, it was booze that got me the kids in the first place......