Saturday, December 25, 2004

Big Fucking V!!

My man-crush, Jason Varitek, just re-upped with the Red Sox for 4 more years. I cannot begin to tell you what that means to me. Maybe the wife will get lucky tonight....

Let's go back a few years or so. I first heard of my boy Varitek (from here on out known as Big V) when he came to us via a trade along with Derek Lowe for Heathcliff I- am-now-sitting-on-a-pizza-box-because-I-just-destroyed-my-last -piece-of-furniture-after-your-latest-blown-save-you-jackass-Slocumb. I would have to say that we got the better end of that deal...don't you agree? I think that I saw Slocumb taking my order at Wendy's the other day.

Moving on...

I think that the Red Sox did the right thing here, but it was a bit more $ than I think that he should have received....remember that this is coming from his wanna-be bitch. Apparently he was demanding a no-trade clause and that was the big sticking point for some time because a few other players, namely Manny Ramirez and Trot Nixon, had clauses stating that they would get a no-trade clause if anyone else received one. The Sox generally don't give out no-trade clauses at all. Apparently The Sox and The Evil Scumbag Snake Devil (Scott Boras) did some quick math and came up with a clause stating that Big V would a get no-trade after 8 continuous years in the majors with the Sox. Trot and Manny will not hit that goal during their current contracts, so it works out for everyone. Except Manny and Trot of course...

Anyways, I'm fucking psyched! We also signed Wade Miller for $1.5 million, with incentives that could have the deal top out at $4.5 million, the other day. That is a HUGE signing. He has better career numbers than that fuckstick Carl Pavano who signed with the Yankees to be the meat in the Jeter/A-rod pie. I wonder if he gets a portion of his salary in KY Jelly? Maybe he can be the pivot man in the circle jerk. Either way, I am feeling much better about our chances to defend the WORLD FUCKING SERIES after signing Miller, David Wells, and Matt Clement for the same amount of $ that gayboy Pedro Martinez wanted. Speaking of that jerri-curled bastard, did you see that he totally dissed his midget pal? Now the midget is taking offers to be the official ball-lapper for any team that'll have him. He is the perfect size for that. What a douchebag that Petey turned out to be. Unfortunately, I have already made my feelings perfectly clear in a previous post. But still, that fucking dickhead..er, um....nah, let it go Colin. Let it go. But I'm not bitter or anything. No, not at all.

That'll about do it for now.


- The Notorious C.O.D.


3 Comments:

At 2:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

More details on Pedro dissing the midget please. What could the midget have done to piss Pedro off?

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

Maybe he didn't gargle...so to speak. I do know that when my midget doesn't complete his midgetly duties, it sure makes me blue.....

 
At 11:14 PM, Blogger The Cod God said...

Actually, Petey said that he was "a joke" during his
press conference after he signed with The Mets. And everyone knows that "gravitationally challenged homo-sapiens" are too proud to overlook a comment like that. Now he's greeting people and dancing on top of the ice cream freezer at his sister-in-laws gas station.

Seriously.

No joke.

Google it.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home

Blog Directory & Search engine